School Ties

My father never browbeat me. His preferred method of teaching me a lesson was through catchy phrases, pithy proverbs, some borrowed, some adapted, and some his own. When I would retell the story of an engagement (and I use this term not in its marriage sense, nor in its social sense but in its military sense) with a teacher or professor, he would try to hide his smile at my parrying and thrusts, at my sharp edge in debate and then intone, 'Never argue with a man with a microphone.' He would first remind me of the importance of showing respect to my teachers, and then explain that it was never a fair fight, not because truth wasn't on my side, but because my opponent could knock me out simply by ignoring me.

But this lesson was not the first. He used to tell me, "Son, this is Patriarchal Principle #I- You don't have to live in a garbage can to know it stinks.' The context was usually a warning against the petty vices that sought my allegiance, drinking and smoking, etc.

That bit of common sense, however, isn't so common anymore. In our experience driven, relativistic age no one is allowed to judge anything, but woe be it to the one who dares judge without firsthand knowledge. If I say, "Rap music (if I say rap music I contradict myself, but bear with me) stinks", some sophomoric stalwart will reply, "How do you know? Have you heard all rap music? You can't say that until you've heard it all."

This common sense is not so common among parents either. When it comes to government schools many parents suggest to their kids, "Get in that trash can, and find out how bad it smells. And don't come out for twelve years." These parents object to home schools and Christian schools because they don't want to "shelter' their child. They want them to know what the "real' world is like. (There are, of course, other excuses for why parents hand their children over to the state, but we'll talk about those another time.)

This line of reasoning will certainly teach children this truth about the 'real" world: some kids have silly parents. If it is a good thing for children to be exposed to the horrors of sin, why stop at government schools? Most of these parents wouldn't pick up little Johnny after school and take him down to the local bordello for another slice of the 'real" world, or have him spend his summer vacation in a federal prison. But why not? We don't want to shelter the lad, do we? Maybe we'd better have him work the night-shift down at the convenience store so he can learn the hard realities of armed robbery.

I'm not suggesting that we need to keep our children ignorant of all the evil in the world. My father didn't say to me, "Garbage cans don't stink, but don't go in one anyway. Just trust me on this." A parent ought not be afraid to tell his child of the awful consequences of sin in our world. After all, if you want your children never to read about any sex or violence, better slap a PG-13 sticker on the family Bible.

There is a distinction between knowing the smell of sin, and living in it. And there is no reason to force our children to live in it. If anything, doing so will only get them used to the smell. It may even turn them into little green grouches that love the smell. It will define deviancy downward such that kids conclude, "Well, I must be a pretty good guy, I'm not as bad as that guy sitting next to me." Sure Mom, me and my friends (and be assured their grammar will be defined downward) aren't like the bad kids at school. Sure we get high before class, but we're not like those guys that deal the stuff."

And why do we believe that sin is more "real" than obedience? Why is the government school more "real" than the home school or the Christian school? Are parents phantoms, myths? Despite their increasing rarity, parents are not yet extinct. The reality is that the world is not made up exclusively of relativistic teachers and barbaric teens. There are actually parents and kids out there who serve the King. They're real. If they're not, I'm wasting a lot of time and money with this newsletter.

Government schools are a tie worth breaking. They are a stinky, smelly garbage can, filled with the rotting lies of modernism, and the scavenging rats of post-modemism. And that's no place for our children. It's the smell of death that surrounds them. Be principled patriarchs.