Peace Be to This House
Peace Be to This House
I remember being asked by my yet unmarried friends, just a few weeks after Katie and I were wed, for an account of what marriage is like. And I remember remarking that it was like I was finally home. What I did not mean by that was that I was experi- encing relief after a difficult and laborious pursuit. Every one who knows my wife knows she's not a hard person to love. But what I did mean was that I had been completed and I was at peace with my helpmeet. The new Daugherty household was established in peace. We pray that as our clan grows so will the peace within our walls.
Home is very often and in many different contexts symbolic for and synonymous with peace. It is so in music, literature, drama, dance, even baseball (see vol.5/issue 3). There's no place like home, right? And yet a house in turmoil will send all within her scattering.
If peace is worth leaving home and fighting for, it's also worth staying home and working for. It's worth profound sacrifice and discipline. It's worth cultivating. I think it helps here to think of discipline in terms like we think of cultivation. Think of discipline in terms like training up and bringing up and ordering and fruitfulness. We plant seeds and we water. We graciously and care- fully train and protect. We gather the fruit in thanksgiving. Peace doesn't stay, and it certainly doesn't grow in a home where the corn doesn't get hoed.
Few places are more foul (maybe Ashland, Kentucky) than a home where the husband and wife are at odds with each other. And fewer things are more silly (low-carb beer comes to mind) than the "guys-against- girls" spirit that follows. The battle is always larger than a "one- on-one" conflict. The husband and wife are a picture of the peaceful union between Christ and His Church. A husband and wife at war with each other are communicating a dangerous lie. They do so to watching young children. It is the responsibility of the husband and father to bring the home to order and it is the responsibility of the wife and mother to help him with his respon- sibility. Together they are to train up children who obey God's commandments to obey and honor their father and mother. Parents ought to do every thing in their power to make honoring parents an easy commandment to keep.
Wielding the rod is not always the most pleasant part of making disciples in the home, but it is good and necessary. We've all seen parents who appear to be more afraid of their own end of the rod than the child is of his. When we withhold correction for the sake of peace, it is not really peace that we get. It's hardly even a calm before the storm, quiet but tense and anxious. In our impatience we are tempted to trade eternal peace for temporary silence. The Proverbs are replete with wise counsel on keeping your eyes on the ball. That the rare rod produces a rotten son (Proverbs 13:24). That a square strike will save his soul (Proverbs 23:13). The necessary pain of discipline leads to "the peaceable fruit of righteousness" (Hebrews 12:11). The Word of God gives us peace about cultivating peace.
I believe there is an appropriate time to show mercy to our children whom we are discipling, just as our Father continually shows us His mercy. We just don't call our laziness mercy. When we show mercy to our children, we tell them what they deserve. We tell them that we are being merciful just as our Father always shows mercy. We act deliberately with the end in sight.
Now, we can cultivate a sort of absence of conflict to a relative level of tolerance for a little while. We can fool others and even ourselves for a time. But if the Holy Spirit does not breathe life into our homes, we should never expect peace to abide with us. We can't expect that which comes from the Spirit to dwell in a house the Lord has not blessed. Where the Spirit does not live the Spirit does not bless.
We cultivate real and present peace in our homes by making disciples of our households. We have to he at peace with God before we can spread it. "A harvest ol righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace" (James 3:18). We lovingly and obediently teach our children to love and obey God. We teach them to trust in the finished work of Christ alone for our salvation. We teach them with passion that it is by His righteousness imputed to us that we are right with God. We diligently teach our children the pure gospel of peace (Romans 5:1).
The Fruit of the Spirit of peace does not come to a home alone. With it comes love, joy and patience, kindness, goodness, faith- fulness, gentleness, and self control. We love one another. We pray for one another. We live securely in His protection and sovereign will. We are content. We are thankful.
And the Fruit of the Spirit of peace does not just stay in the home. It goes with us wherever we go. And our now peaceful homes cannot contain it. Friends and family visit and become witnesses also to the world. Children grow up and carry on their heritage. They make disciples. As we teach our children to obey all the Lord's commandments so will they.
Peacemakers, raise up peacemakers. And, Sons of God, raise up Sons of God (Matthew 5:9). Keep the peace and the faith which is given to us. Peace be to this house, and to yours.