Spinderella
by Denise Sproul

Ladies, think back to the last form you had to fill out where there was a space for you to list your occupation. What did you write? The overall theme for this issue is 'spin' or how we have our thoughts skewed by the careful wording of our enemies and how we sometimes make the same mistakes. This article will specifically deal with how spin has taught us to devalue the calling of women.

We all laugh when someone 'jokingly' says, "Do you work, or do you stay at home?" We sometimes shrug it off, thinking it's natural for someone to wonder what our work is, and we overlook the fact that they might actually think it's weird not to have a 'real job.' The fact that many of us have to uncomfortably assert ourselves by saying, "Yes, I work, and yes, I stay at home," shows that many people think that each is mutually exclusive of the other. We should never speak in this way ('work' or 'home' -i.e. lazy couch potato) and we should always kindly correct it. If a man asks you this question, you might politely counter with, "Do you work, or do you raise children?"

Make sure you know that God has called you to work (see Genesis 2). Do not look at your work as something you have to hurry up and do to get to the fun stuff, with an attitude of 'working for the weekend.' I remember when I was single and teaching school having even my attitude about washing dishes change when I heard Elisabeth Elliot speak of 'doing all to the glory of God.' Working heartily as unto the Lord applies to whatever tasks He gives us to do each day, no matter how mundane they may seem. Seek to delight in your work and recognize it as work don't try to rename it as play. Work hard and delight in the toil God has given you.

This spin which devalues women's work in the home actually precedes the modern feminist movement. Women used to be described as "housewives," as if they were married to their houses. This may be because so many women had only their houses to take care of and not so much their children, with the children gone a large part of each day at school and often gone in the summer at camp. Your job is not to be a wife to a house, but a wife to your husband and a mother to your children, if God has so blessed you.

The word 'homemaker' is a better one than 'housewife' because it is a much better representation of what you do and encompasses much more the heart of what your work is about. Other options include 'keeper at home' (you are keeping the home running, with all the myriad jobs and delights that involves), or 'garden tender', or for those with small children, 'tender garden tender' (I can't take the credit or blame for that last one R.C. gave it to me!) No one will take our role seriously unless we take it seriously; that includes the necessity of working hard and also refusing to be apologetic about doing our God- given task, as if we are doing work of second rate importance and are just too lazy to have outside work. If you are ever tempted to believe that nonsense about yourself or know someone else who thinks that about you, perhaps you should invite them to come over and spend, oh, maybe about your typical 16 hour work day. If they just sit and watch you, they'll probably go home exhausted!

1 don't really mean that you should have someone over like that to prove the validity of your work. You are accountable to your husband and to the Lord. We need to remember to tend our gardens. Do not neglect your calling by going on a crusade to defend your calling. Don't form some sort of NAAGT - the National Association for the Advancement of Garden Tenders. You are not a victim; if your focus is on your garden, you won't care whether people think you're napping in the bean patch when you are actually hoeing a tough row. Neither should you fuss unduly at people in your own life who mistakenly use this 'work or homebody' distinction. Just make sure you and your children do not believe it.

As an aid to not believing the world's spin, it also helps to avoid taking in the folly of the world. Steer clear of the Oprahs and the "ladies" magazines that aren't written by or for real ladies. Most, if not all, magazines on a typical newsstand do not promote the godly values of being Titus 2 women. What they do is teach you to long for a life to which you weren't called, to make you feel like you are missing out. Besides, if you are working like you should, you won't have time for that kind of nonsense (and don't let that send you on a pity party -- that is as it should be!) When you are working hard, and teaching your children to do the same, if they complain about the difficulty of their work after they know how to do it, you can not only teach them a lesson about 'doing all things without grumbling or complaining,' you can remind them (and yourself, silently) that yes, much of our work is hard and that God made it that way. Resist the urge to entice them by saying, "Oh no, this is easy!" You will be inadvertently teaching them to resist things that are in fact hard.

So back to my original question -- what do you put in that little box on the form that asks what you do - short of writing an essay? If you don't already, think about it next time and don't write your answer angrily, defensively or apologetically. Try to choose a word or two that describes the joyous, glorious work you have been granted the privilege of doing. Whether others know it or not, as homemakers and as handmaidens of the Lord, no "working woman" should be able to outwork us, for we work for our greater husband, Jesus our King.